In Memoriam

My grandmother passed away this morning. She was in her upper 80s, so at least she lived a full life. As an aside, I always thought her name was Josephine Marie (and that my middle name came from her middle name, as my first name, Tina, came from the first name of my other grandmother - Ernestine). I found out this summer that her first name on her birth certificate was indeed Marie... I thought that was cool, that both my first and middle names came from the first names of both of my grandmothers.

Anyway what is really sad is that I hadn't been to visit her (and my grandfather) since 2001. I was so busy with school (and so broke) that I just kept postponing it. My mom went up there to visit and help take care of some things in February. I was thinking about going at the same time for just a weekend, but we agreed that it would probably be best if I just waited... she was going to go visit again in the summer and I could go then too. So that was the plan, I was going to try and go this summer. Oh well, now it's too late, at least for me to see my grandmother. I hope she knew that I loved her.

I now am concerned about my grandfather. You read about this stuff all the time... people who are together for soooo long become somewhat co-dependent, and when one passes away the other follows not too long after. My grandparents would have been married 63 years this year. That's more than twice my age, it's truly remarkable.

So that news will put a damper on things. My mother has requested that I do not attend the memorial service. Which I think is kinda strange, but apparently the other grandchildren aren't going either. I guess they want it to be really small... she's being cremated so there won't even be a burial. Cremation has always kinda freaked me out.... I really don't know which is worse, being put in a box under ground or being reduced to ashes in a pretty container. I guess this is a morbid discussion, but still, I wonder what other people think... would you prefer to be buried or cremated, and why?